Inner Demons of the Dark Side
by angelcarstairs4679
Summary: Ben Solo has always felt like he was different and it wasn't due to just his long history with the Jedi. This is his story as he trained to be a Jedi before he fell to the Dark side. (May contain spoilers from the latest movie in future chapters!)
1. Leaving home

**Yo guys! Star Wars 8 came out a few days ago and damn it all, it was so good! I haven't enjoyed a film in the cinema for so long and this just makes me love the entire saga all over again. Everything was just amazing and I felt like they did good this time round.**

 **I have been a Star wars fan for most of my life and this film series really showed me how wonderful people can be in crafting such a beautiful story with so many different characters that bring so much joy and meaning to the world. I love how it shows the way the Force works around people and how it is actually applicable to us in our lives. I may not be able to participate in a Star Wars film, although that would be a great honour to do so and an ultra dream come true, but I can try to write a story on a character I believe deserves having more light shone on his background (at least until the movies tell us more about him).**

 **For some reason, Kylo Ren is one of my favourite characters and I find him really mysterious and interesting to find out more on so I decided to write what his life as Ben Solo may have been like. There may be some spoilers from the movie in this in the future but for now, its spoiler free. I apologise in advance in case I make any mistakes with the Star Wars universe because I am not too well versed in it but I will try my best so bear with me! Now sit back and I hope you enjoy this fanfic!**

 **I don't own the characters.**

I never knew what to expect of life. My mum was a princess and a famous politician, not to mention the leader of the republic and the resistance when she was younger. My father on the other hand was a pretty neat pilot who would fly throughout the galaxy in his old rust bucket of a ship along with his hairball companion Chewbacca. That was family life for me; busy mum with her politics and busy father with his space travel.

I would often spend my days alone, not knowing what to do with other children. I grew up on the city planet of Chandrilla since my mother had a lot of dealings there and it would make life easier if we just stayed there. One reason my father was hardly ever around was also due to the city life; he hated bustling cities unless he could get his hands on something useful.

I stared out of the window, shivering slightly as I paced in front of it. I placed my hand on the glass and placed my forehead against it, letting my breath steam the glass to form a small O on it. Just another boring day filled with lessons on politics and the occasional lesson with my mother on the ways of the Force. Not like she was any good with it.

As I slumped against the wall, wishing I could just hop onto a ship and fly somewhere where no one knew who I was, a rap came on the door. I always wondered why everyone had to treat me as though I was a living legend. I knew I had a pretty crazy family history since my uncle was a Jedi master who defeated Darth Vader. Not to mention my mother was considered royalty due to her getting adopted by the Alderaan royal family when she was a baby.

"Coming," I shouted as I walked to the door and slammed my fist on the panel. As the door whooshed open, I stared at the cloaked figure standing in front of me, his face beaming as he swooped me into a hug. "Long time no see, Ben. How have you been?" he grinned as I tried to squirm away. "Come on, Uncle Luke. Its not like you never see me at all," I groaned as my mother pinched me on the ear, making me wince.

"Come on now, Ben. That's not the way to treat your uncle," she chided as Luke grinned like an old goof. I always thought he was a bit off in the head since he was one of the last remaining Jedi masters and had to bring back the old order, bla bla bla. Sometimes I wondered how I was even born into the most messed up family in the entire galaxy.

"Actually Ben, I'm here on some urgent business," Luke said, his face turning serious all of a sudden. That made me gulp a little since he was normally this old goofball that wouldn't mind playing around with his nephew once in a while. But I have noticed that he can be a bit cold around me as though something was wrong with me. Wouldn't blame him since I might have a tendency to turn into some evil bad guy like my grandfather.

"Your uncle has come to take you under his training as a Jedi padawan," my mum said, her voice shaking slightly. Her long brown hair were in her twin buns as always but they were getting streaked with more white now as she aged and also due to the stress of her having to bring so many systems together. My mum and dad have talked about me being Force-sensitive before but they never elected to send me away to train with my uncle.

"Wait hang on. Why all of a sudden?" I asked as my mum shook her head. "You're getting older now Ben and your powers are getting a little out of hand so I think its best to send you to your uncle and teach you how to control your powers properly," she said as she held onto me. My mum wasn't really a hugger so this was a bit of a shocker to me.

"We leave tomorrow so start packing. Try not to bring anything memorable since we try to cut ties with the family once we move into Jedi training," Uncle Luke said as I felt my heart race. Moving away from my family on such short notice, having to cut off ties with them… "Don't be silly Luke. We'll visit him once in a while," mum said and I wondered if she would even have the time to visit since she could go without seeing me for months when we were in the same apartment building.

"We'll see about that," Luke muttered as he and my mum turned away. "Wait. What did dad say about this? Surely he would be against me moving away so suddenly," I begged, now feeling the dread of having to be isolated from my family to control a power I never really wanted. I knew I had tendencies to lash out and break stuff with my power once in a while but don't all kids throw tantrums at some point in their lives?

"I called him and he said its fine. In fact, he was the one to insist that you should go," my mum said as I clenched my fist. My dad was rarely even around, preferring to hyperjump all over the galaxy instead of focusing on spending time with the family, although he had taken me on holiday once to some funny casino planet in the middle of the outer rim just for kicks. Mum nearly killed him when she found out.

Knowing it was no use arguing with them, I relented and told them to leave me alone to pack. I moved like a robot to the drawers and began plucking things from the shelves. I stuffed clothes into my bag but other than that, I didn't know what else to bring since the most I had are really boring books on politics and the Force. Then I caught sight of the only family photo I had ever taken with my parents sitting on the bedside table.

Reaching my hand out, I used the Force to bring the photo to me. I grabbed it and for a while hugged it against my chest, letting it soothe me as I felt my heartbreaking. I was being sent away to be trained as a Jedi, something that should have been done ages ago. I could only wonder why my parents would make such a sudden decision and pray that I would make it out alive.

…

"Luke," Leia said as the door slammed shut behind them and they made their way to the balcony. "I still wonder why you chose to raise the boy on this planet. The air is so stuffy from all the politicians around," he groaned as he coughed a little. "Work," she sighed as she took her place next to her twin, holding onto his arm. "Tell me what's wrong, Luke. I can sense something is on your mind," she said as he squeezed her arm.

"You know how I am growing more afraid of his power. I have never seen such untamed power in my entire life and if the Sith were to ever get their hands on him…" he said as Leia squeezed his arm. "Then bring him to your Jedi temple and train him to be a Jedi," she begged as she shook. Luke had never seen his composed sister shake often except when she had lost Han back when they were younger.

"But you know the risks. He's already 12 years old, far to old to train as a Jedi. His bonds with you and Han may bring him confusion during his training. You remember what happened to our father," Luke said. "I know the risks but I worry for his future. If he doesn't train in the light, we would lose him and war will rise again. I don't want that to happen again."

"He's my son and I worry for him too. I don't want him to end up like our father. I couldn't bear to see my baby boy become him," she whispered as Luke embraced her, stroking her hair as he tried to calm her down. "Promise me you will train him in the light," she said as he nodded. "I will. I promise," he said as the Coruscant sun set behind them.

….

I found myself standing on the platform, a large silver ship sitting on it. "Well come on. Don't dawdle," Uncle Luke called as I turned to look at my mother for what may be the last time. "You heard your uncle," she smiled as she got down and kissed me on the forehead. "Dad didn't bother do come back again?" I asked, forcing all the sarcasm I could think off into my voice.

"Your father has some business to attend to," she said but I could tell she wasn't convinced on her husband was up to. She reached into the folds of her dress and produced a small hologram message recorder from it and pressed it into my hand. "He left you this," she said as I pocketed it, scowling as she hugged me again. "I will always love you," she said as she released me at long last, letting me join my uncle on the ship.

"Fair well, Master Jedi," she said as she bowed slightly. "And to you, Princess Organa," he said as the ramp went up. When it finally shut, I looked at him in curiosity. "Why do you two always have to be so formal with each other?" I asked as he rubbed his head. "Formalities," he said as he went to his chambers. "Get some rest, kid. You have a long life of training ahead of you," he said as he closed the doors behind him. As I awaited my arrival at my new home, I could only think what challenges I may face ahead of me.

 **Hope you guy enjoyed this! I'll try to update this as much as I can since I have other stories being in the process of being completed.**

 **All comments are** **welcomed!**


	2. Getting tempted

**Here is the next chapter! Thanks to those who have read and followed this story so far! It makes me so happy to know that people out there like this story.**

 **Even though there aren't any reviews so far, I'll still try my best to write it as I know there are people who take their time to read this but it would be nice to pop in a review... (I'm a little over reviews but yeah...)**

 **This is sort of a way of me to rant my thoughts about the latest movie since it was so good but because I don't want to DBAD ( a term used in my uni meaning Don't be a douchebag) I'll just control myself and write a story with as little spoilers as possible. Most of this is just made up so you don't need to worry about any spoilers until I point it out in the chapters to come.**

 **I don't own the characters.**

Training began and my life as a Jedi in training soon became something I never had second thoughts about. I was considered to be some sort of royalty since my parents were so famous for the war and Uncle Luke tried not to treat me as a nephew while I was there which was a little hard breaking since he was the only remnant of my past that I had left.

Some of the students over there did tease me about being the nephew of the so-called last Jedi who managed to turn the tide of the war and bring balance to the Force but other than that, I didn't really have that many pals. I don't know why but I seem to fail really badly at human, or rather any form of alien species interaction since I barely had the chance to communicate with people as a child other than my caretakers or my mum.

"Come on, Ben. Rise and shine!" Don called as he rapped on my door. I groaned as I twisted in my sheets, the cold seeping into my bones as I stretched. It was still really early and I remembered correctly that we had to go for some mind training lessons. It's become a normal routine for me but given the chance, I would just sleep in the entire day.

"What's up with you? You look like you haven't been sleeping lately," Don said as he stared at me in the face. "Nightmare," I muttered as we trekked down the road. I always had trouble sleeping since I came here and it wasn't because of just the cold. I felt like something had been bugging me in the back of my mind for a while now, not wanting to leave me alone until I let it in. It always left me feeling uneasy and shaky but I didn't want to tell Uncle Luke. It wasn't like I could approach him without making a fuss about it.

"You should go talk to Master Skywalker after this. I'm sure he would be able to help," Don offered as I shook my head. "I can't afford to look so weak around him when everyone thinks I'm a sort of legend," I muttered as he sighed. "Give me a break. You just happened to be related to him. For all I know, I might be related to some big shot somewhere in the galaxy," he said as I looked at him. I knew that he was a little sensitive about the topic of parentage.

"Sorry, Don. I didn't mean to…" I started to say as he laughed. "Just kidding. Besides, I think it kind of a good thing I don't know who my parents are since it would make it hard to focus on our studies since it has to do with not forming bonds and stuff," Don said as I hung my head low. I knew Uncle Luke still carried out the normal tradition of bringing in children to be trained at a young age, most of the time when they were three at least so I was the oldest to be admitted into the school.

I kicked a pebble out of my way as we reached the sea that yawned in front of us. This was our usual spot for having our morning meditation session. I still found all of this meditation stuff super annoying but I guess I have to suck it up until I leave this place. Uncle Luke was already waiting for us there along with some older students, all of them seated in a circle waiting for us.

"Welcome boys," he said as he waved us to sit. Some of the students snickered as they know I was the one to normally make the class start late but I have mastered the art of studiously ignoring them as I sat down on the slab of rock, crossing my legs beneath me as he started to speak. "Calm yourselves and let the Force flow through your minds, calming you as the sun rises. Concentrate and breath," Uncle Luke spoke as all of us concentrated on the surroudings around us.

I could feel the breeze around us, ruffling my hair as I thought of the Force. I felt the life around me, the air, the sky, the rising sun, the sound of the waves hitting the rocks. I felt the Force wrap me like a blanket, showing me the warmth it offered along with the cold. I gasped a little when I felt the air around becoming colder, shivering as I felt the rock underneath me shudder a little.

"Ben?" Don asked as I began to shake more. I wanted to open my eyes but they seemed to be glued shut. "Ben! Snap out of it!" Uncle Luke shouted as I felt myself get sucked into a vacuum. I felt like I had been sucked into a black hole, all of the air sucked out of my lungs as I fell. "Ben Solo," a voice spoke as I whipped my head around.

"Who the heck are you?" I yelled, trying to steel my nerves. Uncle Luke always said to be calm when entering these kinds of situations but I can never think of the logic behind feeling calm in this kind of dilemma! "Young Solo, I sense conflict in your heart. I sense raw power in you. Something that has been passed on to you by one of the greatest Jedi of all time," it spoke.

"Don't mess with me! I know Uncle Luke is a Jedi but that's it!" I yelled. I knew I only had one Jedi in my family as my mum didn't train to be one despite being Force sensitive. "Oh but you don't know of the man whose blood runs in your veins," it whispered. "What do you mean?" I yelled as it chuckled, sending chills down my spine. "You know who it is," it whispered.

"No. I don't know anyone else!" I shouted. I thought of how strange that my mum and uncle never mentioned anything about their birth parents despite knowing who they were at least. I did try to check up the records in the archives but nothing ever came up. It was like looking for a needle in a haystack about their pasts despite how famous they were.

"Do you really want to know the truth, young Solo? It may set you free but also give you a great burden," the voice beckoned to me and I lowly began to realize this was the same voice that haunted my dreams. "Who are you?" I shouted as it laughed, its voice ringing throughout the void. I twisted my body, trying to search for the source of the being that had been haunting my dreams.

"I am the person who will show you the way to your true destiny," it said as blinding light filled my eyes. "You belong to one of the greatest bloodlines of all time. Your grandfather was the one who brought the galaxy to its knees and wiped out nearly all of the Jedi," it mocked as I felt my stomach twist in knots. I didn't need to be a genius to know who it was.

Before I could demand further, I felt myself getting tugged back to reality and I fell onto the grass, my whole body shaking with sweat as I gasped for air, breathing for what seemed to be the first in a long time. "What happened?" I muttered as the others gathered around me. They moved back to give me some space as Uncle Luke came to me, his eyes searching my face with such fever that I got scared.

"Master?" I whispered as he looked at me in the eye. I tried to keep a professional relationship with him whenever we were in the presence of others but sometimes he does treat me like a nephew, no matter how rarely. "What did you see?" he asked as I gulped. "I was falling in a void. A voice spoke to me, telling me it would explain everything I wanted to know," I said, my heart still racing from it.

Uncle Luke got up, breathing heavily as he moved to the side. The place where we had been seated had been split in half, the rock I've been seated on crumbled. It looked like the area had been hit by an earthquake. Some of the students looked rattled as they stared at me, the person who had caused such destruction, something that wasn't normally done by a Jedi. Something that could be done by a Sith.

"Come on, back to your studies. Forget this little episode ever happened. Off you go, younglings," Uncle Luke said as he shooed off everyone save for me. Don gave me a wave as he went off for his lightsaber training session first, leaving both of us sitting on what was left of our meditation site.

"Ben. Has something been troubling you for a while?" he asked. "Nothing really," I muttered as he gazed at me intently. "Its alright to be afraid to tell me anything. Do you miss your parents?" he asked as I shook my head. I hadn't really thought about them since I came here since I was so used to them not being around anyway. "Its not that," I said as his eyes searched through me. I felt like he was digging through my brain with those blue eyes of his.

"Its nothing to be afraid of telling me, Ben. I won't judge. I am your Master after all. And your uncle," he said as I gulped. I felt like he was trying to pluck out the truth out of me rather than letting me tell him willingly. It was as though he was thinking I was hiding something. "Its nothing. Honest," I said as he sighed.

"You think that something like that would cause so much destruction?" he asked as he pointed at out sitting spot. "I…" I had no idea what to say. I know my powers went on a rampage once in a while but I thought they were sort of normal, right? Uncle Luke looked like he had gave up trying to get the truth out of me and just got to his feet, patting me on the shoulder as he turned to go back to the temple.

"Feel free to talk to me," he said as he left me to stare at the sea. I watched the sun rise, letting it calm me from the excitement from earlier as I pulled something from my pocket. I stared at the hologram message, turning it in my hand as I pressed the play button. An image of my father appeared on it, seated in his quarters on the Falcon. I recalled the times I spent sleeping with him or playing gambling cards in that very room.

 _Ben. I'm sorry for not being able to be back there for you. I really miss you and your mum, kiddo but I am kind of stuck in an urgent matter here so I won't be able to make it back in time. I just want to say that what we asked Luke to do is the best option your mother and me could think off. I'm sure you're dying to get off that planet anyway so it would be a good chance for you to go socialize with people your age, although I don't know how sociable Jedi can get._

 _Just promise me that you would control that temper of yours. Your mother's always telling me that she gets a bit scared when she finds a hole in the door or something along the lines. If anyone can get your anger to cool, Luke should be the one to do it. Man, I feel like I failed as a father for you now, haha. Me and your mother will come visit you as often as your uncle would allow it, got it? Don't you worry. Now go without worries and with our love._

 _May the Force be with you, Ben. I love you. Always._

The message ended as I twirled it in my hand, the words of my father playing in my mind as I thought of what he said. It has been two years since I came here and he and my mum have yet to visit me. I couldn't care less but I would be grateful if they sent me a transmission once in a while. I stood up, stretching my body as I went to fulfill my duties for the day, wishing I could find out the mystery behind the Skywalker family.


	3. Building a lightsaber

**I have been leaving pretty long messages before the start of each chapter so I'll just leave it at here for now.**

 **I don't own the characters.**

Years flew past and before I knew it I had risen to the level of Padawan, although that came as a surprise. People called me a prodigy; I thought I just got lucky. Although I have to admit besides all the training on meditation and trying to cool my temper isn't all that bad. I enjoyed the swordfights the most. It was amazing how I could use a simple sword to cause so much damage.

"Concentrate, Ben. Don't let your feelings run wild," Uncle Luke said as he watched me swing the lightsaber. For the time being I was using a training lightsaber so I have yet to make my own. That I would do when he says I am ready, which I wonder when would that be. It's been five years since I have been stuck on this rustbucket of a planet and my parents have came to visit, lets see, maybe once? I'm lucky though that they managed to visit me because I thought they wouldn't even come.

Taking a deep breath, I concentrated on the Force, letting it steady my mind as I brought the sword down. The rock in front of me split with a crack, making others turn their heads as the two pieces fell onto the ground. "Uh, was that supposed to happen?" I asked as Uncle Luke sighed. "In a way but not to this extent," he muttered as he grabbed me by the shoulder and steered me out of the room.

Finding solace in one of the classrooms, he closed the door shut behind us as he turned to face me. "Your powers are growing, Ben and you've mastered them better than I had expected. I'm proud that you made it this far in such a short time," he smiled as he patted my shoulder. I wasn't expecting him to do that and that made me smile a little. It had been a while since the old man actually gave me a compliment.

"Well then now. Onto business. I think you should be ready for this now," he said as he handed me a small round device. I clicked on the middle, a hologram emerging from it to reveal a map. "Is this what I think it is?" I whispered as I stared at the trail leading to what seemed to be a Jedi temple. "You're ready to take on the path of Jedi Knight. Find this temple and build your lightsaber. That is your first step," he said as I nearly hugged him. Not like I would anyway.

"Thank you, Master Skywalker," I said as I turned to leave, almost jumping with joy at the thought of being able to rise in rank. There have been more Jedi Knights now that he restarted the order but not many so I was glad to be able to make it that far in such a short period of time. As I walked to my tiny hut, I stopped outside of Don's one, wishing I could tell him the good news. But knowing better, it would be best to let him know after the test. I knew how he was feeling about getting along with his skills as a Jedi since he had been here twice as long as I have and hadn't progressed as much.

Sighing, I quickly went to pack my things and went to the ship that had been prepared for me. It had been a while since I flew in one and I gladly jumped into it, feeling the controls as I flicked on the switches. There was no leaving committee but I could feel my uncle and mother cheering me on from wherever they are.

I smiled at the droid waiting for me below the ship, waiting to be brought up. "Hang on, R2. Just give me a minute," I grinned as I settled him into the ship. E was a really old droid unit that has seen much better days and was one of the few droids that would actually come with me on a mission since I was considered to be a reckless person. For some reason, R2 made me feel as though someone from my family was by my side at all times. "Ready R2" I called and he beeped in agreement. Turning on the ship, I pressed the ignition and soon found myself in space.

The space around me was black save for stars dotting the area and maybe a planet or two around the area. I punched in the coordinates of the temple and jumped into light speed, letting myself relax as I felt myself take the jump. As white light swirled around me, I brought up the photo of my family, gazing at it as I recalled where it was taken.

It had been the only holiday that we had gone on as a family and it was to the planet of Naboo. The planet was beautiful, rich in nature and the buildings there were beyond what I had seen. Rich in history due to being involved in the clone wars and their architecture, I had ran about the main palace, shouting at my parents to keep up.

I remembered stopping in front of a particular painting of one of the queens, her face regal as she posed for the artist. "Mother, who's that?" I asked as she gazed at it. I could tell that she felt something about the woman in the picture and I thought that they might even look alike in some ways. "She was one of the youngest and greatest queens to rule the planet. Some say she was a prodigy and steered it to greatness when she became a senator," she said as my dad came and shooed us away. After seeing the painting, I thought of how my mother had a look of longing on her face as we left.

Shaking off my thoughts, I realized I had arrived at the designated planet. R2 let loose a series of beeps as I stretched myself. "Calm down, R2. I'm just getting ready for the landing procedure," I muttered. Vrogas Vas loomed in front of me, the winds of dust starting to hit the screen as I touched down. Cursing on why I got sent to such a barren world, I pulled the visor and cloth over my face, blocking out as much dust as I can as I walked to the Jedi temple, R2 hot on my heels.

"Where is it?" I muttered under my breath as I tried to find the structure. Since most of the temples were mostly in ruins by now, I reached out with the Force, searching for the ancient structure buried somewhere in this land. I felt the air around me, the dust and the ground beneath, how the place seemed to be barren of life. I thought I might have been able to pick up a few life form signals or two as I felt myself connect with something.

"Bingo," I grinned as I reached out, bringing the structure to the surface. The temple emerged from the swirling dust, letting me gaze at a structure that was once a magnificent place of study for the Jedi, although I have no idea why they would pick such a desolate world to build it. Less distractions I guess. R2 beeped with agreement as I gave him a knock on the head.

We made our way in, the halls echoing with my footsteps as I came into what seemed to be the main entrance. Statues of past Jedi masters lined the hall, making me shudder a little at the faces that stared down upon me. Reaching out with the Force, I tried to find the Kaber crystal, the thing that would allow me to build my lightsaber. I had even brought some tools with me to build the lightsaber. Better get armed with it in case I got into trouble with some of the locals, if I could even find any.

Thinking about the trials made my stomach roll a little. I knew that Uncle Luke was using the old system but I was hoping he would at least cut through some of the steps since there were so many to go through. As I tried to clear my mind and focus on the task ahead of me, I felt something calling to me, reaching out to me as I tried to hold onto to it. _"Come,"_ it called as I reached out, trying to find out the source.

A door in front opened and I walked through it, looking around what looked like a tunnel carved out of rock. Some lights glimmered behind it, as though there were crystals imbedded in it. I held the blaster in my hand for reassurance, watching out for any sort of attacks when I heard a buzzing sound.

"Finally there is a visitor!" a voice spoke as a light shone ahead. "Who are you?" I demanded as I raised the blaster in defense. "Eh? Pointing a blaster at your host?" it snickered to reveal a withered looking bug. "How on earth are you even still alive?" I muttered. "My kind live for a long time and I have served the Jedi for as long as I can remember. What brings you here, young Padawan?" it asked. 'I came here for the Kaber crystal," I replied as it grinned.

"Very well then. This way please," it said as it led me through yet another door to a dark room. R2 gave me a beep of encouragement as he stayed behind, leaving me with the old bug. "Search your feelings and they shall guide you to the crystal. But be warned. Fail and you will suffer the consequences," it said as the door slammed shut behind me. "I know that," I muttered as I closed my eyes, reaching out with the Force for the crystals. I have no idea what I was doing, searching through the blindness like a bat.

I could feel something calling to me and I felt that it was not the crystal from what I know. "So you're here, boy," a voice said as someone appeared from the darkness. I nearly yelled when I fell behind, seeing the person that emerged. The man barely had any skin left on him and he was stark bald. I wondered if he even had any teeth left in his mouth.

"Ah what a place to meet you, young one," he sneered as I held the blaster in front of me and let it loose. It just phased through him and he chuckled. "Shit," I cursed as I just pocketed it. It was just a projection so it must be one of those tests I have to overcome. "Since you're here I assume that you are about to build your lightsaber," he said as I glared at him.

"Yeah and you're in my way so will you kindly let me pass," I said, knowing how he would answer. "Not until you hear the truth," he said as I recalled the voice that haunted my dreams for the past few years. "Wait a minute. You're the one giving me sleepless nights," I said. "Well of course. I have something important to tell you after all. Something about your past," he said as I felt this urge to know even though I shouldn't.

"I don't need to. I have a lightsaber to build," I said as the man chuckled. "Oh but you will need to see this," he said as he disappeared from sight. Breathing a sigh of relief, I was about to advance when I heard a hissing sound from in front of me. The sound of footsteps soon followed and I gaped at the sight before me. A man had emerged and he was none other than Darth Vader.

"Wait a minute! What are you doing here?!" I yelled as I tried not to panic, using the Force to grab chunks of rock from the walls and hurl them at him. "Do not resist the dark side, boy," he snarled as I fired the blaster at him. "So I have to defeat you eh?" I said as I felt the Force around me, letting the walls around me shake. I knew it was a stupid idea to cave the area around me but I guess I didn't have much of a choice.

"Impressive. I didn't know that my bloodline was this powerful," he said as I stopped in mid motion. "What do you mean bloodline? I am not related to you in any way," I hissed as he chuckled. "Oh aren't you?" he whispered as he ignited his lightsaber and rushed at me. I let the ground beneath me shake, making him stumble a little before I found myself face to face with him.

"So I meet my end here?" I groaned as he chuckled. "I won't kill you. Not today," he said as he pressed his helmet against me. I gasped as I felt some images flow into me, one of them containing the woman I saw on Naboo. "What is she doing here?" I whispered. "She was my wife you see," he said as the image flashed to her giving birth. There was another image of a man screaming in agony as he was being rebuilt piece by piece. I shuddered at the thought of being torn apart like that.

"No. Don't tell me," I begged as the image flashed to a younger image of Uncle Luke, his bloody stump of an arm bleeding as Darth Vader faced him off. "I am your father," he whispered as Uncle Luke let loose a wail. My heart raced, hearing the truth about my unknown lineage. I never expected to be linked to the very man who threw the entire Jedi Order into chaos.

"No!" I screamed as I lashed out, the walls around me shaking as my power went out of control. I felt the ground shaking and the hiss behind the mask as Darth Vader watched on. "Such raw power! Such anger! If you come to the dark side, I would surely make use of that power," he hissed as I shook my head, trying to block out the reality of my lineage.

"Never. I will never be like you," I hissed. "But you are like me. You have my blood. You've seen it in their eyes, haven't you? That look of fear. Even hatred," he whispered as I recalled how I was treated by my parents and Uncle Luke. Their faces floated in front of me, the words on their lips inaudible to me as I lashed out with everything I had.

"Enough!" I screamed, the ground caving in to leave both of us standing over a pool of hot lava. Sweat popped from my brow as I steeled myself, wishing I hadn't lashed out so much. "That's it. Use the Force to kill me," he said as I grinned a little too savagely. "But you're already dead," I said as he chuckled. "We will meet again soon, my grandson," he said as he diminished into a blue crystal.

It hovered in the air for a moment before I used the Force to bring it to my hands. I stared at the Kaber crystal, the light blinding me as I pocketed it. "That took you long enough," the gatekeeper said as I exited the passage. I felt like I had just ran for miles, my body shaking as I sat down, pulling out my tools to make the lightsaber. I crossed my legs together, letting myself calm down a little before I began the procedure.

"You're making it now, kid?" the bug asked as I started to use the Force to bring about the bits and pieces together. Metal began to link together and not long after I had a lightsaber in my hands. Grinning, I placed the Kaber crystal into its slot and closed it, igniting the blade. Blue shot out of the tube, whirring to life as I swung it around.

"I did it," I whispered as I sank to my knees, exhausted from the entire task. I knew I had to get back soon so I just said goodbye to the bug of a gatekeeper and took my leave. Sitting in the cockpit as I flew into space, I could only stare at the lightsaber, thinking of what I had just learnt. R2 gave a few beeps of concern but I batted him off, sleeping for the rest of the way until we returned to the Jedi temple.


	4. Mission to Tatooine

**I didn't expect the craze over The** **Last Jedi to be so crazy but hey, this is Star Wars. Hope you guys enjoy the story! I don't own the characters.**

I felt my heart thunder in my ribs as I bucked up from the bed, my body shaking as I pulled the blanket against me. My lightsaber had been ignited in my hand and I gazed around wildly, trying to find the person that had been haunting my dreams these few months. The door opened with a sharp bang as the Jedi master in charged of my clan, Master Oboros stared at me and the lightsaber in my hand.

"What troubles you enough to light your weapon at this time of night, young Solo?" he asked, his voice slightly slurred due to being too sleepy. I wondered how he even managed to hear my lightsaber when he was so far away. "Its nothing master. Just a bad dream," I said, trying to put away my face of fear and plaster a mask of calm instead. He just shrugged and closed the door behind him, moving away back to his hut.

I lay against the hard bed, my eyes searching the ceiling as I placed my lightsaber onto the table. I had these dreams for a while now and I just wished they would stop. They would often lead me to not being able to sleep and being rendered exhausted the next day, which in turn lead to me being questioned by other people.

I realized that these days, people were more cautious around me. My feat of being able to create a lightsaber within less than five years since I arrived seemed to have been a big deal and everyone in my clan my age were just trying to improve as fast as they could to reach my level. I touched my Padawan braid that swung against my neck, rubbing my hand through my quite short hair. I think mum and dad would actually freak out if they see me with this hair.

The next day I just sat alone at breakfast, shoving down what food I could find chewable before leaving for training. Now that I was going to be training under Uncle Luke as his apprentice, I was to meet him more often than ever for training and one thing I was really happy about was that I could officially follow him on missions. So far I have only been on expeditions to find new Jedi younglings, which I often found quite boring.

"Hey Ben. What's up?" Don grinned as he sat across me, digging into the thing they called porridge on this planet. My stomach churned as I thought of the more exquisite food I used to get back home. "I have to leave for Tatooine in an hour with Master Luke for a mission," I replied as his eyes widened. "Wow. To be under the Master Luke himself must be something. I got assigned to old Master Lokita. She's hardly any fun," he groaned as I patted him on the back to move to the bins. "Don't worry. I'll tell you everything that happens when I get back," I grinned as he gave me a high five. "Go get them, Solo," he said as we parted ways.

"Good morning Ben," Uncle Luke grinned as he sat in the cockpit of the ship. He started to flick the controls as I sat next to him, R2 beeping nearby as we took off into space. As we entered ligthspeed, he filled me in on the details of the person we were about to bring here. "A Jawa?" I asked as he nodded. "There aren't that many who are Force-sensitive so this should be an interesting one. Just try not to scare them too much," he said, his eyes distant as he recalled his home world.

"What's Tatooine like?" I asked. "Just a dustball of a planet. Nothing to it," he mumbled as he settled in his seat, pulling his hood over his head as he started to snore. Wondering why he would just nod off to sleep whenever there was a trip, I walked to the back where R2 was and just started to mess around with the equipment to kill time until we reached Mos Eisley.

When we touched down, I immediately had to pull up my scarf to avoid swallowing a mouthful of sand as we made our way to the person who would take us to the Jawa camp. Uncle Luke began to speak in a language I never heard off before the creature skittered off to get our transport. "Are the Jawa's a dangerous bunch?" I asked as we got into the transport, a small cruiser that at least blocked the heat and sand. The place was teaming with alien species, all of them trying to get to their destination in the midst of the chaos the sand storm brought.

"They are rather peaceful but they have a knack for droids. I got this fella here from a group of Jawas actually," Uncle Luke said as he patted R2 on the head, who looked as though he didn't recall the memory in a fond way. Grinning, I watched the scenery turn from city to barren land. We were to ride the transport to a certain point before taking speeders to the place. I pity poor R2 who had to stay behind with the transport until we get back but it couldn't be helped.

"Don't worry R2. We'll be back in no time," I said as he gave a beep of protest. I swung myself onto the speeder, grinning as I took hold of the controls. "Just don't go too fast Ben," Uncle Luke warned as I turned the handles of the speeder, causing me to shoot ahead way too fast. I yelled as the wind whipped at my face, hurriedly trying to adjust the speed until I came to a reasonable pace. "Told you," Uncle Luke said as he appeared next to me, looking calm for an old man on a speeder.

"How long till we reach there?" I yelled as he shouted back, "Maybe an hour. We may have to stay for a while there to gain their trust but other than that, we should make it there by nightfall. I don't want to run into any of the Tusken Raiders then." Wondering what in the world Tusken Raiders were, I concentrated on making it there in one piece and not long we found ourselves facing a large transport, a group of little robed aliens moving around it.

"Is that them?" I asked as Uncle Luke got down. Taking it to be the place, I followed after, watching as he began a conversation with one of the elders of the place. The elder spoke in a series of whoops and screeches, beckoning for a smaller Jawa to come closer. Uncle Luke smiled as he took it by the hand and started to converse with it, the small creature making some cute sounds as I just watched them talking.

While they talked, I leaned against the side of the transport, watching as the twin suns of Tatooine set in the horizon. They were beautiful, two balls of orange hanging in the sky that casted a glow over the planet before they sank into the horizon, turning the place into a dark plane. After what seemed like a long time, Uncle Luke called me over and told me that we would be staying for the night as he had to talk to the Jawas for a bit about bringing the child with us.

The place we had been given wasn't too bad and I rolled around on the metal bed, wishing it was made for a much bigger person. I had to crouch in order to fit and I lay there, waiting for sleep to come over me. I dread falling asleep recently since I would normally be plagued by nightmares if I do. Uncle Luke was still outside and I let my eyes close for what seemed like a moment before the roars came.

I bucked out of bed, grabbing my lightsaber as I ran out of the room. The camp was in chaos, large robed men hollering as they shot at the Jawa's. Uncle Luke was trying to calm them down but I guessed negotiations had failed miserably. "What's going on?" I demanded as I held my lightsaber in front of me. "Put that away, Ben. You're just agitating them even more," Uncle Luke warned but I kept my ground.

"Just explain to me the situation!" I snapped. "They claim that this is their territory so they want them to leave but the Jawa's claim that its theirs. The Tuskens aren't pleased with it and they started to shoot," Uncle Luke said grimly. Typically inter species conflicts. One of the Tusken raiders hollered as it released a shot from its rifle, causing the Jawas to scatter in terror. One was already lying unmoving on the ground from an earlier assault.

"Listen to me, Ben. Take the child and leave. I'll handle this," he ordered.

"I won't leave you, Master!"

"If you don't, we'll lose the child and there will be one less Jedi in this galaxy! They are too precious to lose!"

"That let me help at least!"

"You're too inexperienced! If you let your anger get the better out of you, it will make things worse!"

My lightsaber quaked in my hand as a shrieked filled the air. The tiny Jawa that Uncle Luke had been with earlier lay on the ground, writhing in pain as a Tusken Raider stood over it. It squealed as it threatened to shoot her once more.

"Leave her alone!" I yelled as I used the Force to lift the Raider into the air, making it howl in terror before slamming it into the transport. "Stop that, Ben!" Uncle Luke yelled as the Tusken Raiders opened fire. Some of the Jawas fell as they fled, their screams corrupting the night air as they died. Not being able to take it any longer, I charged, ignoring Uncle Luke's yells as I sliced into the Tusken Raiders.

I didn't care what was going on around me. My blade sank into flesh quicker than it ever has, beheading Tusken Raiders around me. Blood stained the fine sand, shielded by the darkness for now until the sun rises. I yelled as I buried my lighsaber into the one that shot the young Jawa, letting it shriek before twisting the blade home. Soon the Tusken Raiders were either lying dead at my feet or had ran for their lives.

"Come back here! Cowards!" I shouted as Uncle Luke grabbed my shoulder. "Ben, stop! Look around you! Its over!" he shouted as he waved his hand around the carnage that lay around us. Dead Jawas and Tusken Raiders lay about, the small youngling mewling in terror as Uncle Luke gently scooped it up in his arms and brought it to the speeder.

"We're leaving now," he snapped as he swung himself onto the bike after the Jawa. He then muttered some apologies to the elder, whom I could tell just wanted us to leave with the child. As I got onto my speeder, I saw the look of terror in their yellow eyes at the person who caused so much death to their family. Looking away from their gazes, I kicked on the ignition and raced off into the dust.

By the time we reached the transport and got to Mos Eisley once more, Uncle Luke was in a slightly better mood to at least tell me how mad he was with me. "If I hadn't done that, there would have been more casualties!" I snapped.

"If you hadn't raised your blade, those Jawas would have been spared!"

"Who knows what would have happened if those animals were to have been let free? We should have wiped out every last one of them!"

"This is not our conflict and you have no right to take away another's life! Its against the Jedi code!"

"Then maybe the code is nonsense since it does not tell us to kill those who harm others!"

I panted hard, angry for what he had told me. Its more logical to kill them than keep them alive right? "Take care of the child while I sort out the fueling. You're dismissed from this mission," he growled as he lowered the hatch. I couldn't be bothered to answer as the ramp went up, leaving me with a small Jawa child who squeaked in terror when I looked at it.

"Come on. Let's get you somewhere to rest," I said as I offered it my hand. It stared at me with its yellow eyes for a while before it allowed me to lead it to one of the back rooms we have bunks in. I watched as it scrambled onto the bed, squeaking about its first experience on a ship as I grinned.

"You'll get used to it when you become older. Don't worry," I said as I patted it on the head. It squealed a little as I did so but it allowed me to tuck it in and soon it was sleeping peacefully. I went to the cockpit, making sure everything was in order by the time Uncle Luke arrives back here.

"If you don't keep that temper of yours in check, you're going to be in serious trouble, kid," Uncle Luke said as I whirled around to face him. He looked exhausted from last nights events as he started to power up the ship. "I did what I had to do," I muttered as I sank into the chair next to him.

"Be warned. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering. These will lead you to the dark side of the Force. Those were the wise words of my late master," he said. That made me shudder a little at the thought of the Sith as Darth Vader came into my mind. My mouth hung open for a second, wanting to ask more about my grandfather, Uncle Luke's father before it closed shut. "Fine," I muttered as we took off for hyperspace, leaving the dustball planet behind.


	5. The trial of anger

**Here is the next** **chapter! For those of you who managed to make it this far, congratulations and thank you so much for your support. I have also released a two chapter story about Rey and Kylo Ren called "Deep Bonds of the Force" so check it out if you want. I don't own the characters.**

"Incoming!" Don yelled as he blocked the blaster fire for me. "Thanks!" I shouted as I used the Force to propel the enemies back. That allowed us enough time to get everyone out and escape from the place, allowing us to pass the one of the first parts of the trials. "Thank goodness we were in the same team," I said as I clapped Don on the back. We had just arrived back on Jedi temple grounds and received the green light that we had passed one part of the trials.

"Well back at you. To have the most talented Jedi Padawan in the galaxy to be your partner in the trials, you have to be lucky," he grinned. Both of us headed to my hut and locked ourselves in, letting our bodies relax. We had just started our trials and this was one of the first few bits we had to do over the course of the next few years along with some missions. I was glad that we were given a not so difficult task for this part. I heard that it was much crazier in the past to become a Jedi.

"To your very good health," I grinned as I poured out some wine for the both of us. "Where in the world did you get that?" Don grinned as he took a swing from it. "Got the tactic from my dad," I said as I gulped it down. Having a smuggler for a father did prove a bit useful when it comes to getting forbidden items onto the planet. I was lucky Uncle Luke had yet to find out about what I had managed to get.

"Wow. Time really flies quickly huh?" Don said as he looked at the small window poked through the wall. The suns were starting to set and they casted an orange glow over the horizon. "Where will you be going after this?" I asked. "Who knows? Maybe I could become a Jedi master," Don said as he looked out. He never really liked to talk about his future since there wasn't much choice to begin with.

"What about you?" he asked. "I don't know… maybe go back to my home planet and help my mum out?" I pondered aloud as he laughed. "Such a mummy's boy aren't you?" he grinned as I scowled. I used the Force to fling a small rock at him and he blocked it with speed. "I think the younglings would love you," I replied as he gave a chuckle.

"You have so much ahead of you, Ben. You're the nephew of the last Jedi master and your parents are veterans of the war between the Galactic Empire and the Old Republic. You're like a celebrity Jedi," he said. "It comes with a price. People just can't seem to leave me alone and expect me to be great like my mum and uncle," I muttered. _Or become an evil Sith Lord like my grandfather and bring down the entire Jedi order._

"Be more proud of yourself. No one has ever managed to become a Jedi Padawan in such as short span of time like you and you even get to spend time with your family before you came here. Be proud of yourself," Don said as both of us grip hands. "Let the Force be with us in our journey," he said as I nodded. "Same to you," I replied.

When Don had left, I just took to lying on my bed and stared at the ceiling, letting the sound of the bugs outside try to lull me to sleep. I was tired but I couldn't seem to fall asleep. It had been a while since I had my encounter with my dead Sith grandfather but it kept haunting me in my dreams. I could almost imagine myself with a red lightsaber, massacring Jedi in my wake, leaving nothing but destruction. But it can't be true, I never wanted destruction around me.

I thought of telling Don about this but I had no idea on how he would react. Having people haunt your dreams wasn't exactly the best thing for a Jedi to have, especially when it was about an old creature that looked like a mummy risen from the grave and your dead grandfather haunting your memories. "Come on, Solo. Get a grip of yourself," I muttered as I knocked myself on the side of the head, wishing all this nonsense would stop.

…

"This is going to be tricky," I muttered under my breath as I sat alone in a room. I was at the third stage of the trials; learning to harness my anger. That was something that I always had problems with but over time I think I became much better at controlling it. If only if it was actually usable by the Jedi, it would be a great asset…

"Come on. Stop thinking stupid stuff and focus," I groaned as I tried to steel my mind for what was about to come. Anything could be thrown at me and I was glad I didn't actually had to face anyone in real life since I would have to control myself from choking them or what not. Then I would fail graciously and be kicked out of the Order.

I felt the presence of someone in the room and I turned my head around to see my mother walking towards me, a smile on her face as she held out her arms. "Mum…" I whispered as I went over to her, hugging onto her tightly, for a projection, she was pretty solid. "How I missed you, Ben. You've gotten so much taller. And handsome too," she smiled as she stroked my face.

"What are you doing here, mum?" I asked, knowing full well that she was here to test my control over anger. But why would I be angry over her? "I'm sorry for not telling you the truth. I wanted to wait until you became a full-fledged Jedi. I thought you would better control your powers than so it would be safer to tell you," she said as I felt my heart clench.

"You could have told me earlier. I could have tried to stop myself from becoming like him. I know that I have acted brashly but maybe now I know why I'm like that. I'm the grandchild of a monster, am I?" I asked. "No, you're our son," another voice said as my father appeared next to my mum, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"Dad…" I whispered as he looked at me. His gaze was what I would see sometimes when he looked at me as though I was someone else's child. "I always knew you wouldn't be able to escape from this whole destiny with the Force thing but to think you made it this far, I'm so proud of you," he said as I felt my heart break a little.

"Why? Why did you not tell me? I could have dealt with knowing who I descended from," I whispered. "We only wanted to protect you from the truth," my mum started to say. "Why? Were you scared I would turn to the dark side or something? In case you haven't noticed, I descend from the person who destroyed the entire Jedi order!" I shouted, letting my voice ring around me.

"You're not Vader. You may have his blood, but you're you, Ben Solo," my father said as I fell onto my knees, my hands shaking as I tried to calm myself down. I could feel the air tingle with my rage, the walls starting to shake and the floor cracking beneath me. My anger was running wild and that was the last thing I wanted to get out of hand during the trials.

"I miss you two so much… why did you not come to visit me?" I asked my father sighed. "Your uncle did mention that it would be best not to visit too often to make the process easier," he began but I cut him off. "Uncle Luke was on this too? He knew the truth and never told me?" I demanded. The floor cracked further as I failed to control my emotions more and more. At this rate, I was going to fail.

"That's right. Let your anger free. Use the Force and crush those who are bringing you pain," the voice whispered in my mind as I reached for my lightsaber. I could feel my finger sliding to the trigger before I removed my hand. "I understand. I am mad at you for not telling me, but I understand," I whispered as I let my hand fall to my side. I breathed, letting my nerves calm down and let the room become calm again.

"I love you two, even though you don't visit," I said, trying to force a grin on my face. "We know," my mother said as both of them vanished from sight. I gasped for breath as I fell on my back, relieved the torment was over as the door slid open to reveal an anxious Uncle Luke on the other side. "What happened in here?" he demanded as he gazed around the cracked floor and how frazzled I looked.

"It was nothing," I said as he clamped his metal hand onto my shoulder. "Come with me," he said as he brought me out of the room. Outside some of the other students stared at me and I could soon tell why they were doing so. Some cracks had appeared around the hall and the place was littered with fallen debris. Grateful no one had gotten hurt during the trial, Uncle Luke steered me into what he deemed was his office and slammed the door shut behind him.

"Sit," he said as I let myself down onto one of the cushions, sinking into it. He san into one as well as he let out a loose sigh, gazing at me with his blue eyes. "Tell me, Ben. Have you been sleeping well recently?" he asked as I tried to look him in the eye. "Yes," I said as he chuckled. "Don't lie, boy. I heard from Leia that you had been muttering in your sleep for a while before you were brought here," he said. I never knew my mother would actually pay attention to me when I sleep.

"You have a problem with that?" I replied when he slammed a hand onto his table, the table shaking beneath it. I jumped a little, not so accustomed to seeing an angry Uncle Luke. "Ben Solo, you know that when a Jedi starts to receive dreams, it is mostly a bad thing and I presume yours isn't a good one. You've been having something on your mind since you went to Vrogas Vas. What did you encounter during your mission?" he pressed on.

"I just had the usual vision. Nothing to worry about," I retorted as he snorted. "Really? Then tell me why did Don have to go all the way out to report to me about you not being able to sleep well?" he said. Man, I have to tell Don off after all of this. "Fine fine. I haven't been sleeping well. So what?" I snapped as he growled, "You're a Padawan and you will respect your master."

Scowling, I sank back into my chair. "I knew that this day would come but I hoped it would have come at a better time," he sighed as he sank back. "I presume you know of your lineage," he said. "Yeah. My grandfather was the man who brought the entire Jedi order to extinction," I replied. "Well you've got the idea so now I want you to forget about it and move on," he said.

"Wait you just want me to forget about it and move on just like that?" I demanded. "Your lineage doesn't control you. You control your own destiny," Uncle Luke said as he sank back into his chair.

"You may have passed the trial for anger but be on the look out for the rest. They will not be so easy to pass this time round," he warned as he gave me the order to leave the room. As the door slammed shut behind me, I slammed my fist into the wall, earning some stares from the others. Give me a break. I just had to face my parents and my uncle about my dark past. As if I could just let go of it that easily…


	6. Time to turn

**Yo guys! I just published a story called "A Reylo Christmas Story" so you guys can guess what is it about. Just a bunch of fluff to kick start the festive season. I don't own the characters.**

The next few days went past with a blurr. Not only did I have to get ready for the other trials but now I had to face with getting stares and jeers from other Jedi padawans or even some of the younglings. I may be one of the oldest students but they have been there longer than I am and considering I haven't exactly been part of the clan I was assigned to as long as they have, I didn't have the whole family thing getting along.

As I walked past a group of just turned Padawans, some of them looked at me with a look in their eyes that made me want to gulp. They looked at me in fear, as though I would rip out my lightsaber and hack them to pieces there and then. As though I was a Sith… it wasn't common for someone to tear a room to such a bad shape while facing a minor hallucination. No one heard my conversation with my 'parents' during the trial so luckily I didn't have anyone to dig through that and interrogate me about what happened.

Even some of the Jedi Masters gave me the look when I passed by. I ignored them as best as I could, looking for a way out of the temple to calm my nerves. I soon found myself in front of Don's hut for some reason, the only one who would actually listen to my thoughts.

"Come on in, Ben," Don called without me having to knock. Grateful I don't have to explain myself, I opened the door to find him sitting on his bed, messing around with his ligtsaber. He had taken to cleaning it everyday and he even made a small stand for it to emphasize how amazing it was. He loved it with all his heart since his trial was pretty hard from what I heard since he got sent to the ice world of Ilum.

"Have a seat," Don said as he gestured to the chair. I plopped down, grateful for the silence that surrounded the tiny hut. "They stared at you again?" he grinned. "Yeah… it's gotten worse ever since the trial. I don't know why they think I might just turn into an evil overlord or something because of that. Even the Jedi masters were on the lookout whenever I passed them," I muttered as I ate a fruit he managed to get from somewhere.

"It will pass. Once you become a Jedi Knight you can leave this place and not have to face them again. Just be patient," Don advised as I devoured the fruit quickly. "As if I can wait any longer. It has been around three years since I have been hearing this voice in my head and I have no idea what to do about it," I groaned. Don was the only one I confided my thoughts with about my nighttime chats with the creepy old guy and he had been quick to tell me to go see Uncle Luke.

"For goodness sake, maybe you should go see the Master about this. He can help with this sort of thing," Don started. "And then what? He might think I would turn into this evil Sith Lord and destroy the order like Darth Vader did in the past. You've seen how my powers have run wild. People think I'm the next Vader or something," I snapped.

"What does Darth Vader have to do with you anyway? You're you and he has been dead for a long time! There's no way he would be able to influence you or anything." Now comes the part. I haven't told anyone about me being related to Darth Vader and I guess it wouldn't be making things any better since I was already at tight terms with the teachers and students alike. My parents haven't done anything to help since they hadn't visited me in ages.

"But I do," I whispered as Don cocked his head. "Say what?" he asked as I clasped my hands together, my thumbs playing together as I breathed heavily. I have no idea on how Don would react to the information I was about to tell him but I had to. I don't know whom else I could trust about this. The only one who knows about this was probably my parents, Uncle Luke and that creepy old dude haunting my dreams. I have to get a name out of him at some point.

"Darth Vader is my grandfather. He was my mother's and Uncle Luke's father. I'm a descendent of the most powerful Sith Lord ever to rule the galaxy," I said as Don rocked on the bed. His eyes stared at me with disbelief, as though I had just spouted some nonsense. "You got to be kidding me. No one ever said that Darth Vader even had a family…" he whispered. "Apparently he managed to do that and have both my mum and uncle so here I am. The grandchild of an evil planet murderer," I said with my arms spread out.

I started to snicker before it turned into a full out laugh. I just sat there, laughing at how stupid the idea sounded but it was true no matter how much I wished it wasn't. Don watched as my hysteria took over me for a moment, his eyes darting around hoping that no one heard how I was laughing. "Ben," he whispered as I finally stopped laughing, my hand scrubbing over my face to remove the tears that came out as well.

"Now there you have it. I'm a monster," I said as he shook his head. "No. No Ben. Your lineage doesn't make you who you are. Yes, you may be the grandson of the most evil Sith Lord ever but that gave you such talent that allowed you to rise through the ranks of the Jedi in such a short time. You don't have to be like him. You won't," he said as he grabbed my hand, squeezing it tightly.

"Don," I muttered as I squeezed it back, bringing it to my chest. He smiled as he let me hold onto it as I sobbed; glad I had just removed this heavy burden off my chest. I cried hard, my heart crying out to why I had been placed in this situation. "Hush," he whispered as he let the Force flow through him, letting it still my feelings as I took a deep breath. I breathed in and out, letting the air calm my nerves to let myself settle.

"Go on. Get some rest. You still have trials ahead of you," he said as he patted me on the arm. I smiled, letting him pat me for a bit before leaving the small hut and retreating to my own. I let the door slam shut behind me as I jumped into bed, willing myself to sleep and block out all the thoughts plaguing my mind. I had to rest for the trials but I don't know how much I can take of this crap…

That night, I found myself in a dark room. I groped around, trying to make sense of where I was as the feeling of familiarity took hold. Why does this seem so familiar when I have never been here before? "Welcome, young Solo," a voice boomed as the man appeared on a dark throne, his body as shriveled as ever as he grinned.

"What do you want? I told you to leave me alone!" I snapped. "But I see so much potential in you, young one. You can surpass your grandfather if you come under my wing. I will take great pride in polishing your raw power. Don't you think the Jedi are afraid of your power and are trying to tame it when it should run free? The Force is strong with you, young one. Use it to your advantage!" he grinned.

"No! I won't turn into my grandfather. I won't repeat his mistakes!" I shouted, my hands shaking as I called on my lightsaber. My palms were so sweaty I thought it would slip from my grasp. I was panting hard, staring at the man in front of me as he chuckled. "Just how the hell are you?" I snarled. "I am Snoke, the Supreme Leader of the First Order and your soon to be master."

"What?" I whispered. I recalled this name sometime ago because it had started to rise from the ashes of the Galactic Empire and caused some problems in certain planetary systems. This man, the person in charge of that organization, wants me to be his apprentice? "What do you know of the Force? Why me?!" I screamed, moving forward as I held my lightsaber in front of me.

"I want your lineage. Your bloodline will serve the First Order well just as your grandfather did back in the past. We can rule the galaxy side by side as he once did with the Emperor Palpatine!"

"No! No! I won't become like him. I won't!"

"Oh but you will soon enough. I sense darkness in your heart, young Solo. So do the others who surround you. How long will they put up with you before they decide to put you down?"

"Put me down?"

"Ah but you do know what Jedi normally do to someone who turns away from the light. It would be ironic if your beloved uncle were to bring you down himself."

"Uncle Luke will never do that!" I screamed, my hands shaking as I felt the lightsaber fall from my grasp. The blade sank into the floor, making a hissing noise as Snoke chuckled from his throne at the pathetic boy lying before him.

I don't know what to think anymore. If Uncle Luke were to turn on me, the only person who I ever fully trusted with my future when my parents didn't… I heard the sound of a lightsaber being ignited and I gazed at Snoke to see him grinning a toothless smile.

"I shall allow you to go back to reality for now, young Solo. But if you ever change your mind, you know what to do," he smiled as I gasped, opening my eyes to see a green lightsaber shining before my eyes. As the heat radiated in front of me, Uncle Luke looked down on me, an expression I thought he would never have on his face; fear.


	7. To the dark side

**Here's where the fun begins... also Happy Christmas Eve to those out there** **celebrating this holiday! I don't own the characters.**

"Uncle Luke?" I whispered, terror running through me as I stared at my Uncle who had his lightsaber drawn. He came here to kill me…. I can't believe it…. For Uncle Luke to come here to kill me… what had I done wrong? Could it be because of the exercise gone wrong earlier? Or was it for past missions? Or was it because of the power I have in me passed on from Darth Vader? I didn't ask for this power… I just wanted to have a peaceful normal life… just leave me alone already…

"Ben…" he started to say but I retaliated first, using the Force to snatch up my lightsaber from the table and clashing with his as he brought his down on me. I glared at him, his eyes shining in the light as our blades collided. "Ben listen to me!" he shouted as I snarled. "You tried to kill me… why? Why?!" I yelled as I reached out with the Force. I could feel myself connect with the beams of the roof and I reached for them, dragging them down on us with full force. "Ben, no!" Uncle Luke yelled as everything collapsed around us.

Wood and stone rained upon us, some of them crushing Uncle Luke beneath them. I used the Force to shield myself from the raining debris, letting it rain upon Uncle Luke instead. "That should stall him for a while," I muttered to myself as I climbed out of the rubble, some lights from the other huts turned on as they went to see what was going on.

"Hey Ben! What happened?!" Don demanded as he raced up to me, his lightsaber in hand. Some of the other padawans gathered around as well, most of them shivering in the cold as they stared at the rubble that was my hut. "Master Skywalker tried to kill me," I said as some gasps ran through the crowd. "Impossible. He wouldn't do that to his own nephew," one Padawan blurted out as I threw a hand towards the rubble.

"That's the evidence of what happened! I rained rubble on him when he tried to take my life! He tried to kill me! Why won't anyone listen to me?!" I shrieked, my anger starting to rise along with the adrenaline. What the heck was going on? Why did my own uncle try to kill me? I have to contact my parents… but then again, would they even bother to try to come and find me…

"Ben Solo, you're charged with treason to the Jedi Order for hurting Master Skywalker," Master Oboros said as he ignited his green lightsaber. It hummed in the night air as he walked closer to me, his face determined to strike me down. "Will you just listen to me?! He attacked me, not the other way around!" I snapped. "The Master always has a reason for his actions. You're just a student whose power will be your doom one day," he hissed as Don shouted, "Stop, Master!"

I ignited my lightsaber, leaping through the air to slam it down onto Master Oboros, who managed to block it moments before it sliced his head off. "That weapon should be used for saving, not killing!" he yelled as he slashed at me. "I have enough! I had enough of putting up with you lot!" I shouted as I let all of my anger into the blade. I felt my body course with energy, sending my body movements faster than I ever thought they could be.

We battled out, Master and Padawan fighting while the other students looked on. Some of them looked with awe but most of them were in terror. "Stop this nonsense, Solo. There is no way out," he hissed as I grinned. Now that it has come to this, I think I could let my power run a little more free. Time to let the beast rage loose. The ground beneath us split as I let my energy channel thorugh it, sending Master Oboros stumbling as I pierced his heart.

"Ben!" Don shouted as Master Oboros gave a cry, sinking to his knees. As he fell lifeless to the ground, a yell came as a few other Jedi Masters rushed to the scene. "Young Solo. Stand down this instance!" Master Lokitos yelled as she used the Force to hurl some rocks at me. Knowing that there was no chance of them taking me in alive, I let my emotions flow freely through me, sending my powers with the Force wild.

Rocks began to hurl at the teachers and some of them got crushed before they could be repelled. "Traitor!" Master Lokitos yelled as I sliced the rocks she sent towards me, slashing into her as I grinned, " This is what you get for double crossing me." She fell to the ground, most of the masters lying dead around as the younglings shook with fear.

"You see? This is what happens when someone tries to oppose me!" I yelled, rounding to the remaining young Jedi. Some of them were crying for their lost Masters while others were shaking in fear. Only a few others were still, their eyes wandering on the bodies of their fallen masters. "Ben… what have you done?" Don whispered. "They tried to kill me. I only did what was right," I hissed.

"That is not the way of the Jedi! You should have at least listened for their explanation!" he shouted as I raised my lightsaber at him. "You dare to oppose me?" I hissed as he came forward. "I know you are confused Ben but please, calm down. You can still be forgiven for this," he said as I laughed. It erupted from me without me realizing it, my laugh sending chills down my spine as I let it all out. Oh, this is just hilarious. I had just killed all of the masters of the Jedi Order, including my own uncle.

"Those of you who oppose me, you will end up like them," I said as I waved a hand at them. "You know of my past. I am the son of Leia Organa and Han Solo, veterans of the war with the Galactic Empire that took place years ago. I am also the grandson of Darth Vader, the strongest Jedi to ever rule the galaxy!" I shouted as I raised my hands. "If you join me, I can make you the strongest Jedi this galaxy has ever known. Someone has shown me the truth in this world and he will guide us to greatness. All you have to do is to follow me."

The others stood, most of them unmoving as I took a breath, a little tired after my speech. I didn't want to kill any more than I had to so I hoped that at least one of them would join me. Adrenaline flooded my body as I took in raged breaths, my gaze shifting through the crowd. The sound of footsteps could be heard as Don approached me, his lightsaber in hand. "I am a member of the New Jedi Order and I follow Master Luke Skywalker," he said as he ignited it.

Our blades hummed in the night air as we took our stance, my feet shifting in the ground as I prepared myself. I knew that I was far stronger than him in terms of abilities but thinking of how he would just be wasting my time in getting out of here made me mad. "Don, don't make me do this," I said as he smiled. "You're my friend Ben and I will make you come back to the light," he said as I raised my blade. "Then you're just having wishful thinking," I said as I charged.

I moved so quickly he barely had time to lift his blade. He choked on blood as I ran my blade through him, not giving him a moment to spare as he slid to the ground. I grabbed him, cradling him to my chest as I tried to stop the tears from flowing. The only person who ever cared about my existence now lay dying in my arms. "Ben… you don't have to do this," he whispered as I set down my lightsaber. "You know I can't," I said as he reached for my hand. "Don't let your family rule over you," he whispered as his life drained from him.

As I closed his eyes, I looked at the remaining Jedi, all of them quaking in fear as I stared at them. "Now you know what I would do if you don't listen to me. If you're wise, you will come here," I snarled as the sound of engines filled the air. All of us turned to gaze as a First Order ship came towards us, the ramp already lowering to reveal the man who had haunted my dreams.

"Now you know the truth, young Solo," he grinned as he strode towards me. Some of the younglings squealed in fright as he approached. I held my lightsaber at him, my grip firm as I shouted, "Fine, you were right! They wanted to kill me! Now get me out of here!" Snoke merely grinned, his gaze moving through the crowd of young Jedi. "Then prove yourself to me. Kill the remaining Jedi," he hissed as my blood ran cold.

"Why should I?" I hissed as he chuckled. 'Well my young apprentice, if you don't kill them, I will," he said as he raised a hand. Armed Storm Troopers rushed down, their weapons at ready as they started to fire. Some of the younglings fell, not even a single scream leaving them as they turned to run. Some of them raised their blades, charging at their attackers. The place turned into a battle zone, Jedi younglings, Padawans and Storm Troopers clashing on Jedi territory.

"Well then, young Solo. Choose your side. Do you choose the side which tried to kill you or will you turn to me and let me hone your powers?" he grinned. I felt like punching him, my heart already torn from the entire killing I had done. I stared at Don's body, his face blue in the light and my crushed hut, Uncle Luke buried somewhere in the rubble. I have no one left to turn to, my parents probably left me here to rot…

Screaming in fury and pain, I charged into the fray, my blade driving home into the last of the Jedi Order. Some of the put up a fight but for the most part I overpowered them, sending them to their deaths as my lightsaber weaved in and out of flesh. The tears didn't stop flowing as I killed on and on, life after life taken within a blink of an eye. What am I doing? The Jedi are so scarce… now I am killing the last of them… what am I doing? WHAT AM I DOING?

Some of the Jedi pleaded for mercy and I ended up dragging them to Snoke, who told the Storm Troopers to keep them in the prison hold area of the ship. The fields were scattered with the bodies of Jedi younglings and Storm Troopers alike. My heart was racing, my hand shaking as my lightsaber turned off at long last. I walked towards the temple, the place Uncle Luke worked so hard to build to bring back the people who would bring back balance to the Force.

"Burn it, young Solo. Do it and you will erase the Jedi," Snoke had whispered in my ear as I led the Storm Troopers into the Temple. There were still some people hiding out in it and they were taken care of swiftly. I screamed in rage as I got rid of them, innocent people dying because they were in the wrong place. The Storm Troopers hung back, watching me turn into a crazed killing machine.

"Burn the place down," I whispered as some of the Storm Troopers looked at each other as though they were startled. Did they not get my order? "You have the tools to burn this place down right? Then do it! Burn it to the ground and don't leave anything behind! Burn everything!" I shouted as I stormed out of the building, letting the Storm Troopers do their work.

Paintings and books holding treasures of the Jedi were razed to the ground that night as I stood outside, watching destruction rain upon the place I grew up in for the past decade. I stared at my lightsaber, wishing I could just throw it away. I didn't deserve to hold it. I killed so much with it… I turned to look at the ship where my new Master resided, walking towards it as my feet turned into heavy metal. I have nowhere to go now. I truly don't belong anywhere in this galaxy.


	8. The Knights of Ren

**Merry Christmas guys! This story will end in a few more chapters so bear with me on this ride! I don't own the** **characters.**

I sat in my new quarters, my eyes darting to and fro from the wall. The place was black. The bed was hard, the sheets were normal but I guess I could sleep. I found it weird I managed to sleep here despite having just destroyed the Jedi Order a few days ago. Now I was at a place called Star Killer base on an ice cold planet far away from where anyone I knew was.

I thought of Don lying dead at my feet, my lightsaber skewering him through the chest as I begged him to join me. He had looked so peaceful that the guilt in me made me want to vomit. "Shit!" I shouted as I slammed a fist into the wall. How on earth did I managed to get here? I had turned away from the light and rained hell as my grandfather did so long ago. I knew I never fit in with the light but I didn't find the dark side that tempting either…

There was a knock on the door and a guy by the name of Hux entered. He had a glum look on his face as though he was looking at a bug, his lips pursed into a thin line. I instantly made the decision that I didn't like him. "Solo, the Supreme Leader wishes to see you in his throne room," he said as I sighed. I knew this would happen sooner or later. I just wondered what happened to the other Jedi that came with me.

"Before that, change into something more… presentable," he smirked as he left the room to give me some space. I looked at my clothing, plain white and brown as per what a Padawan was supposed to wear. I walked to the closet, letting it open before me to reveal a wave of black clothing. I removed my outer clothing to leave just my boxers underneath, pulling on lush black pants and a long sleeve shirt. I doned a tight looking garment as well but I felt it fit nicely to me so I didn't mind. I threw on a cape as well, the material bellowing around me as I strode to the mirror.

I looked like a proper villain in the mirror, all black and shadow. My lightsaber hung on my side and I knew I had to change it as well, although I didn't want to part with it. But something with this image made me feel incomplete… my face stared back at me. Ben Solo stared back at me. I wanted to erase this mistake from the face of the galaxy, bring forth a new person who would strike fear into the hearts of everyone in the galaxy. But I have no time to worry about that now.

I walked out of my chambers, letting Hux lead the way to the massive throne room. The place was surrounded with red guards standing at attention at the corners of the room, weapons in hand. At the end sat Snoke in his massive black throne, his face pulled into a smirk as he looked up to face me. There were a group of people clustered at the front of the throne as well, all of them masked.

"So this is the new guy, Supreme Leader?' one of them asked. "Who are they?" I asked as the guy snarled, "Watch your tongue, newbie. I call the shots around here." "That's enough," Snoke snapped and the guy held his tongue, all of them moving to kneel before Snoke. I did the same, although hesitant at first. "Your new looks fits you, young Solo," he grinned as I gulped. Don't tell me he called me all the way out here to compliment on my new wardrobe.

"I called you here today to make an announcement. I have decided on the new master of the Knights of Ren," he said as the guy from earlier looked up. "Sir?" he began but Snoke cut him off. "Young Solo here will be the new Master of the Knights. Treat him with respect," he said as there was a wave of murmurs in the group. I couldn't believe I had been promoted to the leader of a group of Force users so quickly.

"This is bullshit. No way he can be the leader when he has just arrived. He doesn't know the ways of the Knights," the guy from earlier said as Snoke sneered, "Then why don't you prove to them your worth, young Solo?" "Get your weapon out, Trax," he said as the guy I presumed was called Trax removed a axe from his belt, pressing an ignition button, a hum coming from it as light burst from its edges. A Kaber crystal had to be imbedded in there somewhere.

"En garde," he snarled as the others made room for us. I walked towards him, removing my cape as per custom to battles. "Ready when you are," I grinned, feeling a little too confident. That just riled him up even more as he dashed at me, swinging his axe in an arc. I slide to my knees, bringing my lightsaber up as I slammed into him, preventing him from getting my head.

"Not bad for an old guy," I grinned. "What did you say?" he yelled as he tried to hit me. I brought my lightsaber up, cutting at him as he repelled with his axe. I soon got him on the defensive but once in a while he would throw an attack at me. His axe was a bit hard to repel but the adrenaline rushing through me made my movements swift. I always enjoyed a good lightsaber duel.

As he struggled to get back up, I used the Force to bring him close to me, lifting him through the air to bring him close to my face. "Shit. He defeated the Master so quickly?" the group muttered among themselves as the guy Trax pleaded to be spared. "Kill him. A loser doesn't deserve to be on the Knights of Ren," Snoke said as he leaned close, clasping long hands together as he watched. My heart was racing as I brought my lightsaber to his neck. He didn't even flinch as I looked at him in the eyes.

"To hell I will bow to the son of Leia Organa," he growled. "Don't you dare mock my mother's name," I hissed as I let the lightsaber cut his throat, sending his head rolling across the ground. As I sheathed my blade, the other knights were on their knees, looking upon me as their new leader. Now I felt like I was in control and I grinned a little as Snoke stood up. "Arise, Kylo Ren, new master of the Knights of Ren," he said as the group echoed, "All hail Kylo Ren!" It felt good to be called that way.

Once the ceremony was over, the other knights left to leave me and Snoke alone, Trax's body still lying on the ground. I kicked the head to the corner, not wanting it to get in the way. "Supreme Leader, may I ask what happened to the younglings that surrendered?' I asked. "Well, what do you think? There is no place for the Jedi here," he grinned. "You promised you would take care of them! I could have turned them to the dark side!" I shouted. "But you know how resilient they can be. They even put up a bit of a fight. I wouldn't want to waste you on trying to change their ways when they are stuck in the old fashioned ways of the Jedi," he grinned as he leaned back in his chair. Thinking of the others being tortured or dead somewhere in this facility made my stomach roll. I brought it on them after all….

"Now, I have a little mission for you. You are to make your way to the forest moon of Endor," he said as the name rang a bell in my head. Didn't my parents and uncle fought there years ago as the Rebellion and brought an end to the Emperor Palpatine's reign? "What business do you have on Endor?" I asked as he smirked. "You'll see when you get there," he said as he threw me a small disk, showing me the coordinates of the place he wanted me to go.

In an hour, I found myself in a small ship with a dozen Storm Troopers flanking me on the way to Endor. I thought it was so suffocating to have so may people on board to go for a simple retrieval mission as Snoke called it but it couldn't hurt to have security. I guess I am quite the bigshot now. As I watched the forest moon come into view, I thought of the war my parents fought there to bring peace to the galaxy. Now I was about to shatter that peace.

"Leave me," I said as we reached the designated area. The place was nothing but forest and I had to use my lightsaber to cut away some of the vines leading to what seemed to be an old funeral pyre. The sticks were still there and what remained of the person who had been burned was there was well. I gaped a little as I recognized who it was lying on the pyre. "Grandfather…" I whispered as I stared at the remains of my grandfather, the Sith Lord Darth Vader.

Pulling on my gloves, I walked closer, looking at the ancient armour he wore to keep himself alive due to the intensive damage brought onto his body when he was still a Jedi. It was all melted but salvageable as I picked away at the remains, ash still coating it. I picked up the helmet that remained, turning it in my hands as I put it into a bag.

"We've got what we came for. Let us return to Star Killer base for now," I said as I walked up the ramp. As I sat in the tiny room that was my quarters on this ship, I turned the helmet in my hands, looking at what was my grandfather. I should have been disgusted to be holding a dead man's head in my hands but instead I felt a connection with him that I couldn't quite place.

When we returned to base, I went to my chambers, placing the helmet onto a pedestal that was situated at the end of the room. I stared at it, drinking in the face that haunted the galaxy for so many years. "Grandfather, I've returned you to where you belong. You can rest in peace now for I will assume your role in bringing down the Jedi and ruling the galaxy. I won't fail you in this. Show me the ways of the Force, show me the dark side. Show me the power I can harness. Show me the ways."

The next day a delivery came to me and I opened it to find a helmet in it. Thinking that Snoke had sent it as a sort of joke, I put it on, letting it cover my face as I stared in the mirror. Surprisingly it wasn't too hard for me to see and even though I had some trouble breathing, I found I could get used to it after a while. I drew on my hood, masquerading in front of the mirror as I smiled to myself. I looked good.


	9. Crossguard with death

**To sunderside who had been the only one to review this story, thank you so much for doing so! I feel so glad and happy that someone likes this story and I thought it wouldn't make the cut since it didn't get a single review as compared to others out there that received so many on their first day of release. So here is a shoutout to you and as a sort of Christmas gift, here is the chapter you're looking for. I don't own the characters.**

I sat on the ship, my foot tapping the ground to vent off my nervousness. I had the right to be nervous about this particular mission. I was to head to the planet that contained my Kaber crystal. For this one I chose to go on my own. No guards. No Knights of Ren. Just me and the Force.

I had spent months training in the ways of the Dark side and I found that it suited me more than the light ever did. I was always trying to hold back my anger when I was a Jedi. Now I could unleash it at my own will, not having to back down when I couldn't control it. I felt more power coursing through me as I trained, becoming stronger each passing day. I felt like I was being blessed by grandfather who was now one with the Force.

The ship's scanners picked up our destination and I could see the planet surfacing below me as the ship started its descent. The planet was hot, very hot as it was used to mine ore to be used on ships. I thought this place might be called Malachor or something. Anyway, I just wanted to get out of there quick.

Already sweating in my armour, I walked to the temple that lay in ruin, heat rising to lick it as I clambered into it. It had been destroyed years ago in a clash between Jedi and Sith, now lying in ruin with a few Kaber crystals remaining for the taking. I thought of how I would have to go through the normal test to get the crystal, thinking of how annoying it would be.

No guard greets me this time and I felt a little grateful for it. I was in the mood of slicing someone into tiny pieces right now if I could vent my anger in some way. I closed my eyes and let the Force lead me through the maze of ruins, my feet moving without my mind guiding it where to go before it arrived into a cavern, red light shining through it. It looked like a Kaber crystal cave.

"Interesting," I whispered as I heard something ignite. Thinking of what it could be, I snatched up my lightsaber before my head could be hacked off by my grandfather. "Hello, grandfather," I said as he hissed through the mask. "You still have a lot to learn, young Solo," he said. "Ben Solo is dead. I am Kylo Ren now," I hissed as he chuckled, "No one can ever truly cast aside their past."

"So what are you doing here?"

"I'm here to stall you from getting your crystal."

"You can try."

"Oh but I will. You're still weak, clinging onto the light. You have anger, but you don't want to use it. You want to throw it all aside and return to the light but you know you can't. No one wants you. You're not needed. If you failed Snoke, he would kill you. The Resistance would execute you if you turned yourself in. you have nowhere to go."

"Shut up!" I yelled as I slashed as him. My lightsaber glowed brighter, energy coursing through it as I blocked his strike. I switched to the offensive, hitting him with everything I got. I chose this path. I'm not going to regret it. "Just give me the damn crystal already!" I yelled.

As I stuck him for the final time, his words echoed in my head, "Be warned. A power far greater than you ever imagined will be your doom." With that he vanished into bright light, forming a red crystal floating in the air. I grabbed onto it, glad the ordeal was over when I examined it closely. It was slightly cracked and I scowled at how I was going to fix it.

Assuming the cave wouldn't cough up another crystal anytime soon, I made my way to what seemed like a good place to assemble my lightsaber. I stared at my old one for the last time before I closed my eyes, letting my old lightsaber to come apart to make way for my new creation.

I could feel the power of the crystal as I used the Force to build up my lightsaber, the energy crackling as I started to build it. It was strange seeing how the crystal reacted when I haven't even finished it and when I tried to test it, it exploded into pieces, the crystal being too unstable to be contained. Much like my anger and untamed temper.

Recalling something I had read from one of the old texts, I focused my mind once more on reconstructing the lightsaber. The pieces came together once more, piecing together a crude design from bygone ages. As the lightsaber was formed, I let it float into my hand, bringing it to life as I ignited it. I smiled to myself as I thought how I mirrored my very image. Unstable and frightening. Broken and torn.

As I headed back to Starkiller base, I felt myself drifting off to sleep due to the tiredness in my bones. I had never had such a tiring mission for so long and I just felt myself slip away into a dream. It had been a while since I dreamed and I saw myself standing in a desert, the sand hitting my face as I tried to block it. Even my mask failed to get all the sand out of my mouth.

I watched as a young girl moved across the sank, a staff in hand as she drags a pile of rubbish along with her before fastening it onto a speeder. I recognized the carnage of an Imperial Star Destroyer decorating the backdrop, a magnificent sight to behold as they were once the killing machines of the Empire. As she removed her mask to drink some water, my eyes wandered to her face.

She had a look of innocence to her but also had a will so powerful I couldn't quite place it. For some reason, I could search through her mind so I assumed she should be a real person. She looked at my direction for a while, as though sensing my presence before jumping onto the speeder and bringing it to life, speeding away into the sand.

The scene changed to her standing in front of me, the cold raging around us as she held onto a lightsaber. Wondering where she had gotten it from, I didn't have time to react as she charged at me, slashing at me with all her might. Impossible, I have wiped out all the Jedi in the galaxy. And she isn't an ordinary Jedi at that. She was something else entirely, something more powerful and dangerous than I had ever faced…

I awoke to find myself sitting in the cockpit of my ship, my mask off as I sweated profusely. I felt my pulse racing as I sat up, drinking some water to calm myself down. Starkiller base loomed before me and I soon got permission to land. Which I thought I didn't really need since everyone knew who I was. As I landed into homebase, the girl's face loomed in my mind, haunting me as I wondered who she was.


	10. The force awakens

**Here is the final chapter of this story. Thank you to all who stayed with me on this** **journey that began a mere week ago. This was written after I watched The Force Awakens so hope its ok! I don't own the characters.**

Its been a few years since I joined Snoke and learnt the ways of the Dark Side. Being the spiritual representative of the First Order, I was treated with both fear and respect since I wielded something that could bring the death of everyone aboard Starkiller base if they dared to mess with my temper, which had become my trademark of having people stay far away from me.

This time I had a mission to attend to. As I sat on the ship moving towards the planet Jakku, I thought of the person I was about to face. The man was a friend to my mother for years and I remembered seeing him sometimes on holo communications as a child. I wondered how my mother would feel if I slayed her friend. Not like it mattered to me anyway.

I always felt the pull of the light. No matter how much I tried to shun it, it always creeps into my heart, whispering things that wring guilt into my soul. I was torn, not knowing where I belonged. I committed so many crimes that I would never be forgiven if I turned to the side of the Light but the Dark side only exists to exploit me for its own uses as it always did. I had nowhere to return to. No home. No family. No one.

As I rained hell onto the small settlement on Jakku, my eyes fell onto the Stormtrooper FN 2187, who stood staring at the carnage around him. Strange for a stormtrooper to be frightened of a battle. He should have been used to all of this by now. The pilot Poe Dameron of the Resistance on the other hand ticked me off as he was hauled off to the ship. When I gave the order to execute every person in the village, I didn't feel a thing. Why, I don't know. Maybe because I never had any feelings towards anyone whom I felt could backstab me at any moment. Any ally of the Resistance was my enemy.

As I ripped through the pilot's mind, I could sense something working beneath the ship on the planet of Jakku. Something was awakening, something powerful that has been slumbering for so long. What it was, I couldn't fathom. When Supreme Leader Snoke summoned me to his throne, I couldn't imagine why would a mere scavenger be so important to my progress as a Sith.

When I finally came face to face with her, I couldn't help but think that I have met her somewhere. Her resilience made my lip curl as I dug through her mind, seaving through whatever lay beneath that she wished to block out. While I enjoyed the torture, I felt pity for her. Abandoned by her parents for money to drink, having to spend years yearning for their return when no one would, she was almost like me.

She was so pure, so untainted unlike me. She always searched for the truth and trusted in others. No, she wasn't like me. I cannot be as pure as she is. She hasn't committed all the crimes I have done. She lived a pitiful life as scavenger until FN 2187 dragged her into this bloody war. But why does she pull towards me? What was in this girl that made my mind turn? This woman Rey amuses me.

Even as I tried to break her, she nearly succeeded in breaking me instead. She tore words through me like a knife, telling me what I didn't want to hear. Yes, I was afraid of what might happen in the future. What the future held for me if I ever failed Snoke. She could even tell I would never be as strong as my grandfather, who was the very reason I was chosen to be Snoke's apprentice. Not because of my talents, but of the blood that ran through my veins.

When she disappeared from the room, I wanted to laugh out loud at having been stupid enough to leave a Stormtrooper with a girl whom Snoke deemed will be a challenge even to me. After I had my fill of wrecking the room apart, I searched the vicinity for her before an old presence entered. I didn't know whether to be shocked or to be happy. The presence of Han Solo filled my mind as I searched for him.

I told the troops to spread out, giving me a clear path to deal with this anomaly. I could have chuckled to myself as I saw how perfect this stage would be for the final act. This was were I would fully turn to the dark side and cast all of my doubts into the chasm below me. This was where I would kill Han Solo.

But even so, he begged for me to come home. The hope in his eyes made me sick as I thought how he didn't even bother to contact me all those years when I was training with Uncle Luke. I wanted to scream at him, ask him why did he chose to abandon his own son. Was I really not worth saving? As the words spilled from my mouth, even though they weren't meant to be true, I felt myself pour out all my pain and sorrow to him.

"I am being torn apart," I whispered, my heart breaking as the moment drew closer. I had to do this. I had no choice. If I didn't do it, Snoke will see me as a failure. As I handed my lightsaber to the man who was my father, I stared deep into his eyes, seeing how much he trusted a monster. "Thank you,' I whispered as I ran the blade through him, letting him stare at the son who betrayed him. Even then, he tried to bring me back to the light, his eyes filled with both hope and sadness as he fell into the abyss below.

I couldn't describe my feelings then. I wasn't filled with a feeling of completion as I thought I would have. I didn't feel sadness either. Was it due to be not being close to him? Or was it because I had long ago given up any hope on trusting my own parents? I could feel him die, his spirit disappearing from the Force. I knew my mum could feel it too. So did Rey.

Fighting with them on the icy forest plains of the planet made my blood rush. After being injured by Chewie, I was more than ready to trash up the traitor who threw everything into chaos in the fist place. My heart sank a little when I had to put out Rey but I never felt more pleasure at slicing up FN 2187. To think Rey trusted him more than me, it made me sick. I wanted her for myself. I needed her. She understood me. No one had ever tried to talk back to me.

As she faced me off with her lightsaber, I slashed at her, trying not to be taken in by how beautiful her movements were. Mine were so clumsy compared to hers, not polished to a shine but still deadly enough to make me stumble. As the planet crumble beneath us, evidence that the plan had failed, I shouted for her to join me. This brought me back to when Don was still alive when I begged him to come to my side so I could spare his life. This time was different. I wouldn't forgive myself if I had to kill her. I didn't want to take away this bright light from the galaxy.

Yet she resisted me, sending me stumbling back and hacking away at me. I slowly felt pieces of my armour chip away and as I lay cowering at my feet, I reveal the face I have never revealed to anyone for so long. I lay there as Ben Solo, the boy who was seduced to the dark side because no one loved him. Before I could say anything, we were separated, the planet crumbling beneath us at full speed. As she disappeared into the woods, I felt my energy drain away as my mind faded.

I dreamed of myself standing at the platform overlooking the First Order. Snoke was gone and I was now the Supreme Leader. The troops rallied on my command and everything was just as I planned. I no longer had to wear a mask to hide myself. As I turned to look at my side, Rey stood there, all regal in her dark outfit as she took my hand, steering me onto a path where both of us ruled side by side.

I bucked up from the table, my head spinning slightly as I touched my face. "Stay down, sir. You're being patched up," a medical droid said as I lay back down, letting it reconstruct my scarred face. I could still feel the blade slicing through my flesh, branding me as her property. I couldn't help but grin, thinking of how interesting this new journey was going to be. The hopeless boy and the scavenger meet. We shall see what happens in the future, Rey. I will bring you down and leave you bare for the taking. And I will make sure you come to my side.

 **To top this story up, there is a bonus chapter so stay tuned!**

 **May the Force be with you all and see you in 2018!**


	11. Bonus chapter

**The time has come for an adventure in a galaxy far far away to come to an end. Its been a pleasure writing this story for you guys and I hope you all enjoyed this crazy adventure through the galaxy.**

 **I've started a new story called "The Lost Apprentice" about Ben getting an** **apprentice as a Jedi so let's see how that goes. Other than that, sit back and enjoy this bonus chapter. I don't own the characters (sniff...)**

Leia sat on the bed, her hand running through the sheets as she tried to take in the essence of the son she had just lost. She felt him fall into the darkness, the light extinguishing within him along with dozens of other lives. She didn't know what had happened until Luke came to her and told Han to come home as well.

It had been a long time since the three of them were together like this. Maybe the last time was during one of Ben's birthdays. The thought of her baby boy made her heart clench again as Luke tried to explain things. "I shouldn't have done that. If I hadn't done it, he would still be with us and the Jedi wouldn't have fallen," he said. "I know this whole Force thing is a bunch of mumbo jumbo for me, kid but why did you have to do that?! He's just a boy!" Han yelled.

"You don't know what I saw! I saw him killing so many people Han! I was scared! I didn't want Darth Vader to return again!" he said. "That's why we sent him to you! To cure him from this darkness you're talking about!" Han snapped. "Come on you two. Stop this," Leia said, feeling so tired of this conversation. Ben's now empty room was turned into a battle zone.

"I'm leaving," Luke said as Han grabbed him by the arm.

"We're not done here yet. We have to bring back my son. My boy is somewhere out there getting turned into the next Vader and I won't sit back and let that happen."

"And then what? You think he isn't strong enough to kill you? You were never there for him to begin with Han so what makes you think he wouldn't hesitate to kill you?!

"Don't you dare to talk about my son like that!"

"Then prove to me! Tell me you know something about your son!"

"Enough!" Leia yelled, the room shaking slightly with the sound of her voice and the Force. Both men clamped their mouths shut as the princess walked towards Luke and took his hands. "I am his mother and I failed as well. But we must still have hope in him. I'll accompany you to find him, Luke. Whatever it takes, we will bring him and the Jedi back."

Even as she said that, Luke started to shake as he held onto his twin, the tears rolling out of his eyes as he wailed for the lost cause he had failed to nurture. Han stood at the side, watching both siblings console each other over each of their loses. He was never good with family since he never had one and one of the main reasons he was hardly ever at home was because he was afraid he would do something stupid and Ben would hate him for it.

"I'm leaving," Luke said as Leia held onto him, not wanting to let him go. "We'll figure something out Luke. Just stay," she said as he pulled his arm away, moving to the door. "Luke don't do this. Not at this kind of time," she pleaded, something she hardly ever did. She was a princess who would never bow down to anyone. Well, maybe just for a cheeky smuggler that is."I failed you all and the Jedi. I failed to bring Ben to the light. Now I must atone for my sins," he said as he slammed a hand onto the panel, the door opening for him to walk through.

As the door slammed shut, Han removed himself from the wall and moved to the bedside cabinet that held some of the few pictures they had of each other as a family. He ran a thumb over one of the pictures of Ben as a small child, smiling away as he played with the X-wing toy he had gotten for him with Leia. How he wished he could turn back the clock and make things right. But it was too late…

"I'm going as well," Han said as he moved to the door. "Han!" Leia snapped as she stood up, walking towards him to grab his hand. "Han, don't do this! Don't run away like you always did when Ben was still with us!" she said.

"Oh, so you're saying its my fault that our son went rogue?!"

"No! You just never made enough effort to be a proper father!"

"Well maybe I am better at smuggling than being a family man!"

"Then why did you marry me? Because I was a princess? Because I could bring you limitless resources?!"

"I married you because I loved you!" he yelled, his voice ringing throughout the room as he let out a sigh. He had enough. He knew it was a bad idea to marry her but he did anyway. When she announced that she was pregnant, it made it harder for him to run away from the future he had signed up for. God, he loved her so much that he had to leave her. For her own sake and her safety.

"Leia, I'm going," he said as he moved to the door. She didn't make an effort to stop him as the door slammed shut behind him. Leia continued to sit on the bed as the Millenium falcon took off into space, her hands scrunched into the sheets as she cried. She put her face into her hands, sobbing at how she failed to protect her family. Now she had no one left in her life.

 **I just want to remember Carrie Fisher for being such an amazing** **princess to all of us. You will always be our hero and princess Leia in our lives and hearts. Rest in peace, Princess of Alderaan.**

 **May the Force be with you all. Always.**


	12. Release of book

Just wanted to let you guys know but I just published a book of poems called "Looking into the Mirror" under the pen name Angel Carstairs on .uk (its self published and only available in ebook form). Hope you guys will check it out and support it! Its about conquering our inner demons and having to deal with all the shit in life and how it feels to go through certain times in life where you just wonder what the heck is going on.

Here is the link : s?k=looking+into+the+mirror+angel+carstairs&ref=nb_sb_noss

You can also check out my Facebook page "Angel Carstairs' Writing Page" and like and follow it!

Thats about it for now. Checking out now!


	13. Debut novel

Hello again guys

thanks for reading and supporting my fan fiction all this time until the end of it.

I recently ventured into writing and self publishing online on Amazon and recently I released a book of poems called "Looking into the Mirror" and now I'm proud to announce my very first debut novel "Four Unexpected Fates" on Amazon in ebook form which is now ready for purchase. I

Its about four girls who got into the same university and whilst having a sleepover discovered that they each took part in various sports and they ended up talking about their journeys as athletes as they pursue their dreams to be the best in their game or to quit entirely. If you're a fan of sports anime like Haikyuu and Free, then this is the novel for you!

It holds a special place in my heart as I took part in the sports mentioned in the book and it was inspired by my experiences as an athlete who has since retired from them to be the person I am today. Some of the events in the book happened to me in real life and I have changed the names of the individuals who were part of it and even though some of them had hurt me in the past, I'm glad that had happened as it made me into the person I am today.

Hope you will support this book and have a good day!

Title : Four unexpected fates by Angel Carstairs

Link: dp/B07Q3J4T7X/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=four+unexpected+fates+angel+carstairs&qid=1553933518&s=gateway&sr=8-1-spell

Also catch my other book of poems entitled "Looking into the Mirror" by Angel Carstairs.

Looking-into-Mirror-Angel-Carstairs-ebook/dp/B07PTR3N59/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=looking+into+the+mirror+angel+carstairs&qid=1553758936&s=gateway&sr=8-1-spell

P.S. Unfortunately this is only available to read in ebook form .


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